So, who’s on John McCain’s short list this week? It doesn’t really matter, because he’ll be assailing their patriotism and their position on taxes next week, unless Joe Lieberman is there to hand him the crib notes. Nonetheless, the music is going to stop one of these weeks soon, and he’s going to have to make a choice. There’s no figuring what’s going to happen next with this man who used to be a legitimate maverick, but chances are it’s going to end in a monumental misstep, as far as the oddsmakers’ current bets are concerned. But odds aren’t everything, and we could wind up with a Da’ Tara that could make the fall a hell of a lot of fun.
Mitt Romney – Multi-millionaire, Massachusetts: Back in March, I called this one a shotgun marriage that might need to happen. All the vitriol of the winter campaign is evaporated by now, much like John McCain’s erstwhile position on torture which he used like a cudgel on Romney just months ago, and only weeks before he voted against the anti-torture bill in February. McCain probably still harbors a vague hatred of him, but amidst the ideological whiplash of the last four months, a reconciliation between the two doesn’t come as much of a surprise to anyone. There’s a library of debate footage that the Dems are waiting to use against McCain if he taps Romney as his number #2, but as has been fairly clear to this point, the fact that digital video and YouTube exist in the modern political world has been entirely lost on John McCain. He makes this pick at his peril. but lately that describes very nearly everything that comes out of his mouth. And he still hasn’t had to pay a price for it yet, so maybe he’s oiling the Mitt for a comeback.
VeepsBlog 2008 Line: 6 to 1
VeepsBlog 2008 Line (3/3/2008): 8 to 1
Charlie Crist – Governor, Florida: Another week, and Charlie’s still in the lead. He’s young and handsome, and no candidate in his right mind wants to leave Florida to chance. Unless Obama selects Bill Nelson, and he probably won’t, because Governor Crist is too hot a property for a Republican Presidential nominee to pass up, McCain’s ticket to win Florida rests on Charlie Crist. Never mind that he’s probably gay, but that will come out during the campaign, and that will make things really interestning.
VeepsBlog 2008 Line: Even money
VeepsBlog 2008 Line (6/2/2008): 1.5 to 1
VeepsBlog 2008 Line (5/19/2008): 1.5 to 1
VeepsBlog 2008 Line (4/28/2008): 2 to 1
VeepsBlog 2008 Line (4/14/2008): 3 to 1
VeepsBlog 2008 Line (2/18/2008): 6 to 1
VeepsBlog 2008 Line (3/31/2008):4 to 1
Joseph Lieberman – Senator, Connecticut: After his derisive comments about Obama’s speech before AIPAC last week (a speech that earned the newly-minted Democratic Presidential nominee a standing ovation), Barack took the former Democratic running mate aside in the Senate chamber and bitch-slapped him out of the Democratic clubhouse once and for all. Though he’s still officially caucusing with the Democrats, he’s about as welcome at any Democratic function as O.J. Simpson would have been at Mezzaluna after his acquittal in 1996. There’s talk of Joe attending the GOP Convention in Minneapolis-St. Paul this September, and he says he’s willing to speak if asked, but he’s taking his newfound independent status to a perverse degree, sharing the stage with McCain’s former spiritual mentor, Pastor John Hagee. It’s not so much that Lieberman seems to be having difficulty choosing a side, but it does appear he’s incapable of standing with anyone without answering the urge to loose any salvo of flatulence, no matter how rank and no matter how close the company he’s keeping at the present time. I’m not a psychologist, but he seems bent on becoming his own one-man diaspora.
VeepsBlog Line 2008: 140 to 1
VeepsBlog 2008 Line (6/2/2008): 80 to 1
VeepsBlog 2008 Line (5/19/2008): 5 to 1
VeepsBlog 2008 Line (3/17/2008): 14 to 1
Bobby Jindal – Governor, Louisiana: If you believe his exorcism yarn, then the power of Christ obviously compels him, and that might help McCain with the religious right, especially the Catholics, but the problem is…there’s his exorcism yarn. Bobby Jindal is still a much-tounted Wunderkind of the party, but his previous written candor isn’t going to help him as a sensible counterweight to the increasingly unhinged Senator McCain in the fall. In fairness, we all found ourselves involved in some crazy shit in college, but I never felt the force of Satan sitting on my chest. “Though I could find no cause for my chest pains, I was very scared of what was happening to me and Susan. I began to think that the demon would only attack me if I tried to pray or fight back; thus, I resigned myself to leaving it alone in an attempt to find peace for myself.” Granted, that’s a little more profound than my college recollections of, “Dude, I was so effing hammered,” but just the same, it’s not the kind of thing you want out there in the public record. It could be taken as a profound and inspiring tale of a young Hindu man’s cathartic embrace of Christianity, but when you pair him with a nominee whose mental stability is already suspect, this isn’t going to help win a significant amount of votes in the American Breadbasket. Besides, this is the American Breadbasket we’re talking about here, and there are enough of them who will get nervous about the fact that he’s really brown.
VeepsBlog 2008 Line: 45 to 1
VeepsBlog 2008 Line (6/2/2008): 12 to 1
VeepsBlog 2008 Line (3/17/2008): 3 to 1
Alan Keyes – former Congressman, Illinois: According to his Web site, he’s pro-life, pro-family, pro-security, pro-economy, and pro-sovereignty. Unfortunately, he’s anti-Republican and just renounced his membership in the party to join the Constitution Party as their Presidential candidate. He’s got legs, though, and he’s just crazy enough to entice the imagination of the seemingly-confused Senator McCain, who’s looking to harness the Libertarians, the independents, and the pro-sovereignty crowd. Ordinarily this is where I would confess that I was just kidding, but I don’t think I’d be surprised at any pick the Senator makes this summer, short of David Duke.
VeepsBlog 2008 Line: 12 to 1